It is so disappointing...

3As and 1B, B for history. This is what I got for my AS and I really see myself as such a disappointment when friends around me got 4As. This has never happened before in my previous major examinations, never a B. I just can't believe it nor accept it.

There are 16 straight As in my batch and I'm not one of them. This is the worst thing that can ever happen to me and it just happens...

To get over this, it is definitely won't be easy for me. The morning I woke up and checked my result, I felt nothing, really nothing, but when my friends kept sending good news, I knew my heart was filled with intense sadness. I cried a few times, tears just flowed out of my eyes, uncontrollably. The best healer is probably time and sleep. I slept a lot, hours and hours of sleep, which I hoped would make me forget about the B. Yesterday and today, not long, but was long enough for me to accept the reality. Although I got a B for history; although I was and still am sad, life still goes on. At the end of the day, I still have to face all these.

Today, the photoshoot session was terrible for me. I couldn't even take my own result, would celebrating others' straight As be easy for me? I'm glad it was over.

Now, B won't go away or become an A just because I'm sad. I've decided to resit history paper in October. RM600 for this second chance and I swear I'll make the best of this, whatever it takes!

This is sad enough for me but I feel it has taught me a lesson or has pulled me back from something. God is still with me, all the time, I always believe, always. I'm still being blessed, it is just a little part of life that I need to get through. This B will be my motivation to get the best result I can in A2.

Whatever has happened has already happened, I can't change that, but I'm sure I can change something that is yet to happen in my life. If I'm still being haunted by this B, then I really lose the game. Thank God for giving me the courage to face failures in life and these are what would make me stronger.

I'm still fighting for an A or even an A* for history and I believe I will succeed! :D